Tuesday, May 22, 2012

TMI Tuesday: The inverted (perverted) poll

In many polls, you are asked if you strong agree, somewhat agree, neither agree nor disagree, somewhat disagree, or strongly disagree with some proposition. Today, we go the other way. We supply the answer, you supply the question.

1. Tell us something with which you strongly agree, or greatly like.
Orgasms should be equal opportunity.  This means each partner has the opportunity to orgasm. I'm not saying the numbers need to be exactly equal... as a multi-orgasmic woman, the numbers will always be tipped in my favor. What I mean is, if we have sex, both of us should orgasm if we want to. That doesn't mean that I can't give my partner a special orgasm - like a birthday BJ, an "I love you just because hand job" or similar. And I hope he would do the same for me. But when it comes to "normal, every day sex" (what is normal, anyway?) then we both should get the O.

2. Tell us something with which you somewhat agree, or somewhat like.
Spanking. I like the idea of it, but handling it is another issue. I like thinking about, fantasizing about it. I like to think I can handle it. but then I experience it - and the flashes of pain are so hard, I try to run from them. I beg them not to continue or return. So far I've really enjoyed being spanked by the riding crop we have. But open palm? It scares me and excites me equally.

3. Tell us something to which you are indifferent, or have no opinion.
Being told to wait. I don't like to wait to cum; I don't like to be told "later tonight." And yet, the anticipation of waiting is so delicious and juicy it makes me almost squirm with excitement. It makes me wet, just thinking and waiting. In the end, the hate of waiting and the love to of waiting average out to be indifferent. Fine, tell me to wait. I'll hate it and love it at the same time. You'll have me conflicted for hours.  And then we both will reap the rewards.

4. Tell us something with which you somewhat dislike or disagree with.
Not masturbating. Last week, a female coworker of mine complained of period cramps. I hinted there was a way to "take care of that." She understood my meaning, but said she wouldn't be seeing her BF for a couple of days. I then stated that she could always take care of it on her own, and she looked at me squeamish and said she'd pass. Whaaaat? What is wrong with women masturbating? I don't understand it. If you don't like to touch yourself or if you don't even know how to do that, how to do you expect your partner to know what to do? And will you always rely on a partner for pleasure? Why so squeamish about your own body? PLAY WITH YOURSELF. PLEASE.

5. Tell us something with which you strongly disagree, or greatly dislike.
The non-separation of church & state with all these "man+woman=marriage" laws that are being passed in the USA today. These laws are entirely based on "traditional marriage" as seen by the conservative Christian-right. I come from this background, I know it very well. Perhaps that's why it bugs me so very much. I don't care what you personally believe or interpret in the Bible; that's your set of beliefs. It's open to interpretation in many ways. The big problem is that we've lost this separation of church and state... on one hand, we don't want to state to tell us how to worship in any religion. We carefully guard that - but then we want to tell the state it should enforce our personal religious beliefs. It's backward thinking, full of BS. Being from this background, it really irks me. I've had discussions with a variety of these conservatives - who have known me for years - and it shocks me they see the flawed logic and admit it, yet hold tight to it. I still profess as a Christian, and this type of legislation makes me want to hide in the ground and beg people to consider that not every "Christian" is like that.

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!


  1. "I'm not saying the numbers need to be exactly equal..." Amen. Jill outran me in week 1 of our sexual relationship and I'll never catch up. If you're keeping score you're probably doing it wrong, but if all the pleasure is going to one partner or the other, you're also doing it wrong.

    I do find it kind of weird to be the only one who's having an orgasm. There are times when Jill's tired, not feeling like having an orgasm, or when time's a factor and only one of us can get off; I think of it as being selfish (even though it totally isn't) and am resistant. But she always manages to persuade me.

    As for spanking, Jill likes being spanked during sex, typically with an open hand. Then we see photos of the asses of some of our BDSM-practicing friends and we realize that what we consider a spanking, some of these people would consider a gentle love tap. She likes spanking, but she wants to be able to sit comfortably immediately afterward.

    Your co-worker "wouldn't be seeing her BF for a couple days." Maybe I'm crazy, but that seems like the perfect time/reason to masturbate. As for what's wrong with women masturbating, I'd say absolutely nothing, but many women would disagree. As someone who's dated women who simply did not masturbate - perhaps "could not" is a better choice of words - it's far too common considering how harmless and fun it is. I know I frequently dump on religion, but the stigma surrounding masturbation is something for which I believe religion is largely responsible. Imagine how much happier and less-stressed we'd be as a society if everybody who encountered stress or unfulfilled sexual arousal got off right away, and had a ball doing it.

    Your answer to #5 was beautiful, sensible, and so well-written that I stood up and applauded when I finished reading it. Then my daughter looked over at me like I was some kind of idiot, and I sheepishly sat back down. But seriously - brilliant answer. Thank you for acknowledging, as a Christian, that not all Christians are like that. I know quite a few Christians who are intelligent, socially progressive, and non-judgmental. Unfortunately, I know just as many (maybe more) who are frothing-at-the-mouth batshit crazy sex-negative lunatics.


    1. Oh Jack, Jack, Jack. Your last comment with the ovation gave me such a smile (two days later it still does!).

  2. Brilliant answers.

    I really agree with #1 - Vincent and I each come 99% of the times we have sex. It's a good policy - I mean, you're SHARING an experience, right?

    I am in my living room giving you a standing ovation for your answer to #4. I LOVE you for this. Very true and very well stated.

    Bravo on #5 as well. I mentioned the whole gay marriage issue in my answers as well.

    1. Thank you, Mia! Yes, anything sexual is shared so hopefully both would feel satisfied, right?