Friday, June 28, 2013

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

TMI Tuesday: Sex Talk & Sex Ed

June is Adult Sex Ed Month (twitter: #AdultSexEdMonth). The movement was started by blogger @GoodDirtyWoman on twitter. Please read more here:
This week’s TMI Tuesday questions were inspired by Sex-Ed writer Jon Pressick and his#dailysexdiscussion that happens on twitter.
1. Have you ever investigated having an open relationship?
- Have you tried to have an open relationship?
We have talked about having an open relationship, of sorts. Right now I'm looking for a girlfriend who will be my girlfriend (and not his). We're also open to probably playing with other people that we know. Our definition of open is more poly than swinging but we haven't really defined anything yet.
That said, there are definitely people we want to play with.
2. Do you have any sexual phobias?
- What have you done to manage or overcome them?
Maybe? There's not a lot I'm afraid of, sexually. I do have a weird thing about eating ejaculate if not deposited directly deep in my mouth. I don't dislike the taste. It's more that... the texture creeps me out a bit. If he comes on my face and wants me to lick it, I have a very hard time. I actually gag on it.
3. What is the best new sexual activity you have tried in 2013?
Wow.... am I at a loss for how to answer this question? I think I may be! I can't think of anything distinctly new we've done in 2013... hmmm....
4. Have you ever called into a sex advice radio/television show or written to a sex advice columnist?
- Was it helpful?
No, I prefer books and online research more.
5. Would you use the services of a sex therapist? Why or why not?
Yes, I would be open to that if I saw a need.
6. Should sex therapists be allowed to engage in actual sexual activities with clients? Why or why not?
I highly recommend watching the movie “The Sessions” based on a true story of how a sex therapist helped a disabled man live a full, rich life that included sex. Movie trailer:
I think so. Not all therapy is done through talk therapy. Sometimes, physical touch is needed. I've often thought for sex that having interaction and working through the physical with someone knowledgeable would be a positive experience.
Bonus:  Have you read any adult sex ed books lately? What do you recommend?
No, nothing lately. I actually need to add some to my collection so I can continue my learning!
How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblogfrom your website!

Saturday, June 22, 2013

Regaining life

Something I did not expect happened to me in May. I was offered a chance at a new life. It was presented in the form of a change switch: switch departments with a coworker and have some of the change I've been asking for from my work. Ok then.

I had no idea it was going to be so life-changing for me. I didn't move desks or even titles. I just switched responsibilities and my life was free. The change wasn't immediately felt. It took weeks of transition and training to get to something new.... and there it was.

Free time.

Something I hadn't quite experienced at this level for more than two years.

Two years.

I knew my life was out of balance, but I had no idea just how much it was until I actually came home from work - during the week - and found out I was bored. I had nothing to do! No work during the week in the evenings? Home by 7p every night? No full day of work during the weekend?

What am I going to do with myself?!

For the first week or so, I came home and just plopped on the couch, bored. I was not used to this free time and felt helpless. My fiance tried to make suggestions: paint, read, play a game, clean, laundry, draw, go shoe shopping, suck his penis, etc etc. It was so weird: so many choices and I had no idea which one to pick.

It wasn't like any of them were the wrong choice, just that I wasn't used to have any choice at all. Faced with so many choices, I froze.

I haven't had a choice in a couple of years.

When I started this blog a year and a half or so ago, I spent my weekends writing 2-3 entries while my fiance was ignored for most of a Saturday. It became a problem so I pulled back and writing and the number of entries and my stats reflected that. The past eight or six months have been a dreadful pause on writing; but I, as one person, can only do so much.

And now that I'm in a new department, I can breathe again! Live again! I was speaking with a coworker about this and found myself saying, "Yeah, I have time for a hobby again" and I just stopped speaking. What's a hobby?

I cannot believe I've been living life of 60-70 hour work weeks for so long, I've given up on any sort of hobby. Or life.

I have (or will have) a life again! I have no idea what to do with all of this time -- but surely I will find a way to occupy myself, right?

Step one: catch up on blogging.