The sweetest gesture (to a geek)

It's no secret we met video gaming. We're both gamers -- in our own way. He's much more experienced and varied in his choices of types of games and consoles. He loves variety whereas I'm much more focused - I tend to pick a game or two and play them to death. I'll play the same games for years before I'm ready to move on.

For us, gaming has been huge. We met role-playing in our video game. (I was his female character's mom...  he used to type in group chat "MOMMY!!!!" whenever I logged in. I'd completely forgotten about this until he reminded me a couple of weeks ago.)  When we moved in, we still played the same video game, this time across the room rather than across hundreds of miles.

We also branched out to Wii games (my console) and I tried to learn to play his Xbox. I'd never even picked up a controller and it was very frustrating to learn. I tried but we kept reverting to simpler Wii games out of my frustration.  He continued to play Xbox solo.

I watched him play his Xbox. He told me about when he could afford the subscription and he would play Halo and how much he enjoyed playing and trash talking. It's not something I would ever be interested in (or even interested to hear) but I admired the skill that goes into something like that. It wasn't just the skill of playing... it was the excited passion you see when someone genuinely enjoys something. His eyes would light up.

Once I was watching him play solo and I remember seeing the "Killionaire" award flash across the screen. I didn't think much of it until I read in the news the next day how its the rarest title awarded in Halo 4 due to the difficulty of achieving it: 10 deaths in 36 seconds (each one within 4 seconds of the last). I asked him about it the next time I saw it pop across the screen. I would die to achieve that level of playing in a game I loved. To him, it was no big deal. It happened so often he'd stopped taking notice of it.

A couple of months ago, we were playing our favorite game together (Lord of the Rings Online, aka LOTRO, aka where we met) and I asked him how many points he had saved to buy an expansion that had recently come out.  (For background: he was gifted a subscription last year that awards 500 points a month to be used in the store for content, bonuses, etc. Since we're tight on cash to spend on frivolous things like extra gaming content, we'd been saving these points to buy new content.)

It turns out, he'd been spending his points on other perks rather than saving them, so he couldn't buy the content and wouldn't have the points for another three months or so. I had just purchased the content with my saved points and was really disappointed. And a bit angry. We were supposed to be saving to play content together... and now we'd have three months of gaming where he couldn't join me in this new area.

It was a huge disappointment, but not the end of the world. Three months would pass quickly.

The next day when I came home from work, he asked if I wanted to join him in playing the new content. I had no idea what he was talking about - he couldn't afford it yesterday. I asked him what had changed.

He said, "I sold my Xbox."

It took a moment to sink in. "You did what!?"

"I sold my Xbox."

"But..... WHY?"

"So we could play together," he shrugged it off.

"But.... but... your Xbox! Honey... I never expected you to...or wanted you to..."

"I know. But we don't play it together and I'm not really interested in playing solo anymore and this way we get to do everything together. I didn't like how disappointed you were yesterday."

I had no words at this point. Tears in my eyes I just hugged him. What else could I do? He just sold something that had been one of his prized possessions in order to pay for gaming content we could play together.

It's the most romantic gesture I've ever heard of or received and I can't express the incredible love I have for a man to love me so much, he'll sell his Xbox to spend more time with me.

One day, I'm going to buy him a new one.

Geek post: my computer

A post like the following is probably long overdue. I am a geek/nerdy girl --- how have I not talked about my awesome little computer yet!? Four years ago I built myself a computer. It was my first solo build and it was so much fun to select every piece and see it come together. I'd done a couple of builds prior to this for other people and had help. For this to be mine, it was going to be truly my own.

It all started with the case. The case is just like a perfect outfit, a perfect frame, or the perfect car design. It's all for show but its only purpose is to house the real masterpiece which may be hidden from view. I really hadn't thought of what I wanted in a case when I started looking. At first I considered going all flashy with LED lights and colors as I'd never owned my own desktop. Why not go the really fun way?

But then I saw a case in a size I wasn't aware it existed - a miniATX. It was small - just 9 inches tall, 10 inches wide, and 14 inches deep. It was made of red steel. I was in love.

Sure, things are VERY cramped on the inside, especially since I originally purchase a graphics card that took up two PCI Express 2.0 slots... I barely fit in my wireless card. Cords were crammed into every corner, one even pinching itself underneath the graphics card so it could just fit across the case for front USB support.

I didn't care. The whole thing was ridiculously small and cute, something I thought was perfect for a 5 foot geeky girl like myself who loves red. The outside is very simple. There's no LED lights or visible fans. Just a couple of buttons and USB slots.

After four years, I've done nothing but wipe the hard drives and re-load just to refresh the computer. Oh, and I upgraded from Windows XP to Windows 7. But finally, the need for an upgrade really came when my graphics card could not keep up with the gaming graphics and FPS that I needed (that's frames per second, NOT first person shooter). My game is LOTRO and running a 12 or 24 man raid as the tank while everyone is doing the robot is... well, not a very good way to make a good impression as a tank. I muddled my way through with a couple of tries and then gave up. It was just time to upgrade.

In my search for a new card, I came across one where the onboard fan looked a little bit like the Millennium Falcon. I was a bit swayed by this as I'm a huge Star Wars nerd and why shouldn't I want this graphics card!? (If you are just now discovering my love for Star Wars, you need to look at my May the 4th posts from this year and last year). Actually, for my price range it had everything I needed. And, well, the pics will tell you the rest...

One of the best types of package to get in the mail! Newegg!

Oooh. It says "Dragon" on it. It must be cool!

A look inside my case with old graphics card, hidden behind all the wires!

Old card, opposite view. Wires barely reach in some places!

I may have overdone it on the RAM...

It's shiny!

Size comparison, old card to new. Isn't that red steel gorgeous?

New card all snugly inside. Rumored to run graphics in 12 parsecs or less.

And yes, the card can now handle those 12 mans. No more robot dancing in Middle Earth. Geek girl has saved herself once again!

Happy Star Wars Day!

May the Fourth be with you!

Last year for this date, I posted pic of us in Star Wars shirts and then teased you with my boobs. And this year, I'm taking a similar approach. Enjoy!

Peek of some booty.

This image was FHF's idea. I like it.

Tony Harris, video games, and the problem of the "geek girl"

Last week, the 'geek world' exploded with the Tony Harris rant about fake geek girls and how they're a pox to the world, etc etc. I'm so sorry not sorry at all I missed the initial outrage on facebook and heard about it when it was a day old and the web of geek girls and their supports came out in droves to criticize his words and very sexist point of view.

Screenshot

My only reaction to Mr. Harris is this pro tip: IF YOU DON'T WANT GIRLS DRESSING UP IN SEXY OUTFITS AT CONS, THEN DON'T DRAW THEM SO SEXY IN THE COMICS MR. ARTIST.

Anyone see the irony, there? He complains about the sexy little skimpy clothing, and yet, I haven't seen anyone point the finger back at him, a famous comic book artist, and ask: Isn't this YOUR fault in the first place? If you had drawn the women as real women and less than a scantily-clad barbie-like superhero, then perhaps these girls wouldn't be TRYing to dress that sexy.

Or maybe, just maybe, he's mad that a lot of the women in cosplay get-up look a hell of a lot better than the male-geek population. After all, how many male geeks can achieve the un-human like nature of Thor and his muscles? Or Superman's triangle body? The Hulk's lack of body fat? Not very many. Let he who is without body-fat cast the first stone...

Let's really get to his point: for Tony Harris, and unfortunately too many others in this world, girls are "fake geeks" and to even be considered for this category of awesome, they must prove themselves. Over and over and over. As a self-proclaimed geek girl myself, I've had it with not being taken seriously in my geek status. I've never met a girl who considers herself a geek without having an actual claim to the title, either. (Another pro tip: Girls who don't like geeks are NOT going to dress up and hang around other geeks. It's like oil and water. Girl geeks don't geek-shame!)


I've been questioned about my knowledge of Star Wars (even though I used to be the #2 expert on a well-known internet knowledge base/forum), my knowledge of computers (even though I've built several -- yes all on my own!), and I've even been told that my "geek glasses aren't enough" to call myself a geek. (I agree -- but don't judge me before you know me, asshole). Oh, and girl gamers? You're probably just a guy playing a girl in the game -- because girl gamers aren't serious gamers. Girls can't appreciate what a REAL gamer is. (Cue endless eyerolling...)

One of my favorite worst experiences of geek girl shaming was shopping at Fry's Electronics for RAM. I went there with my ex, a tall, pale white male whose appearance generally screamed geek. (Read: relatively poor fashion sense, deathly pale skin, slightly overweight, dexterous fingers from gaming, and a pompous attitude from accomplishing a lot in the online world but little in reality). The RAM was for my computer - which I had recently completed for my first solo build - and I wanted more RAM than the 8 GB I had installed. Rather than buy online from Newegg, I thought I'd give the local big box store a shot to meet my immediate desire. I had a suspicion of what would happen, but the reality was just awful.

We went to the parts area of the store, and looked at the wall of RAM with pricing, etc. In this area of the store, you have to enlist the help of an employee to know if they have stock and order it to the cash register as you don't touch it until you've paid for the product. I found what I wanted, and approached the employee:

Me: "Excuse me?"
Employee: "Yes? Can I help you?"
Me: "I'd like to know if you have an item in stock."
Employee: (looks at my ex) "What were you looking for?"
Me: "I'M looking for RAM, a 4 or 8GB stick."
Employee: (Looks back at my ex) "What kind of RAM?"
Me: (waiting a moment, letting the silence build a moment.) "DDR3 is what I'm looking for."
Employee: (Looks at my ex for confirmation. Ex looks at me. Employee eventually acknowledges my existence). "Ah, ok. Let me check..."

For the rest of our transaction, he talked to me but looked to my ex for confirmation after every sentence and statement. Needless to say, I didn't make my purchase there and avoid that store whenever possible. Every time I'm in there with a male, its assumed I'm the idiot girl who's completely ignorant and doesn't know shit about technology.

As a girl in a man's world, I'm always talked down to. I obviously don't know enough about a topic to be THAT much of an expert. I can't POSSIBLY be THAT into Star Wars -- it just doesn't happen. It's fantasy.  To all the doubters and haters, I give you another pro tip: you don't own the title 'geek.' It belongs to MANY people outside of you and your own definition. 'Geek' unfairly assumes he is a pale, fat guy living in his mother's basement who can't socialize outside of the 'geek' circle and is destined to be virgin for life unless he manages to score one time with that really awkward girl that no one really likes. 

Is that really who the geeks are? No! Granted, I've met one guy who fit that to a T, but that was one in all my life of geek sharing. If you don't fit that description, remember there are hundreds and thousands out there who all have their own unique way of fitting into the 'geek' way. That brings me to another pro tip: Geeks come in a variety of expertise, so don't pick out ONE factor and JUDGE everyone by that one epitomic definition. Mr. Harris went off on comic book readers and convention attendees - in my opinion, a relatively small corner of the geek market, actually. The thing is, there are TONS of ways you can be a geek, and participating in cosplay or reading comic books are not the "one way to geekdom." Really. Traditionally 'geek' has to do with science fiction, fantasy, and technology. But those areas have broadened considerably, just as the word 'geek' has. You can be a LOTR geek by studying Elvish as part of your doctorate and be completely computer ignorant. You can be a LARPer who also loves all things Superman and know nothing about table-top gaming.

Pro tip: Don't scare away the n00b geeks by telling them how much they #fail at being a geek. Remember, we ALL had to start somewhere in our search for geek. We all learned along the way, and no one knows it all from the beginning. Honestly, being a geek is where you have some specialized knowledge of a topic that holds a lot of value to you, but can and may hold little real-world value (unless you're a lucky one who manages to make a living doing something your geeky self loves. Congrats! you're living a dream so few of us do.)

This brings me to my final pro tip: If any of these "fake geek girls" exist, they are NOT going to spend the time and money required to cosplay just to mess with you; you are NOT that important, so stop the paranoid thinking that reads like this: "OMG, the fake girls are trying to flirt with me! Where's my fake girl x-ray scanner so I can run away from all these hot, nerdy chicks who I swear are lying to me!" Seriously, you sound crazy. And no one, not even geek girls, will like and stay with a crazy person.

Disclaimer: I don't read comic books and I don't really enjoy comic book movies. I don't like the over-dramatized action. It grates on me. I like fantasy and science fiction, but the whole superhero genre is not my thing. But I like a lot of other things.

May the 4th

... be with you!

Today is May 4th, aka, STAR WARS day!!! Star Wars is, and ever will be, my most favorite movie of all time. So to celebrate, we give you these....

In our Star Wars shirts and panties

I got booty!

Lifting it up....

Getting closer...

This picture blocked by the boyfriend.

Hope you enjoy our Star Wars feature. And seriously, Han shot first...