I bought toys. I read books. I did online research. I tried. I tried some more. More often than not, I ended up frustrated and angry. Most of this time I had a partner who didn't care about squirting, wouldn't watch the movies, and wouldn't take any interest in helping it happen. I would give up pretty easily and it began to be this far off, impossible dream.
It consumed me. All of the porn I watched that wasn't hentai was squirting porn. It was too hot and I would get off so easily to it. I just wanted it.
The boyfriend entered my life. He completely understood why I wanted it; he wanted it almost just as much. He wanted it on his dick, his chest, his face. He wanted my squirt to cover him. He wanted to swallow it as it shot into his mouth.
We started trying to make it happen. I talked to twitter friends to find out what worked for them. How did they start? What did it feel like? What did they use? We used dick and fingers. I only had 1 G-spot toy and it just wasn't cutting it for me. I tried a couple of other toys, like a glass dildo and the Hitachi. I watched PassionateU video's on G-spot and squirting.
I learned a lot, such as it happens with different toys in every person. That the more you try, the easier it becomes. That the first time is the hardest and then it becomes easier. That some people squeeze their vaginal muscles and some relax. That some need clitoral stimulation and others need just G-spot application. That some can squirt just from clitoral stimulation. That some can squirt from oral sex. Some squirt every time; some rarely squirt. Others it takes certain toys.
And so we tried. And tried. And tried. Some times we dedicated an entire evening to trying to make me squirt. He would remind me to talk, give feedback, try to help him figure out what I needed, what felt better.
Most of the time I've never felt so lost in my own vagina. Where the fuck was my G-spot? And why could I never find it? And why did it sometimes seem to just disappear? And why would I get that "peeing" sensation and nothing would happen? Why would nothing work when it did for others? I could have G-spot orgasms, but no squirting. Nothing.
Monday afternoon, I'm working from home. We were up early without sex or masturbation. Home together in the afternoon, we were both looking through tumblr and getting turned on. Finally, he came over to me and said his hornyness was demanding an orgasm. I felt the same. He wanted to fuck me over my desk, but my weak ankle wasn't up for it. I proposed an alternative: fuck me doggie style while I knelt on the edge of the bed.
I knelt down, feet hanging over the edge of the bed. I stuck my ass up and out and rested my head on my hands on the bed. He slid his dick up and down my slit, rubbing from vagina to clit and back getting the head of his dick wet.
His dick wasn't fully hard when he entered me, so he started fucking me slowly. Slow and gentle thrusting. I could feel him grow harder and bigger in me. My wetness covered him and started making slick noises when he pulled it all the way out and then slid it back in. He rested his hands on my ass and thrusted slowly. I relaxed into him.
He started fucking a bit harder, a bit faster. He grabbed my hips for leverage. I pushed back into him. I squeezed him with my PC muscles, thinking of some twitter advice on working my kegels during sex. We both liked that. I held him tight as he slid in and out of me. He thrusted shallow for a bit, then deep and hard.
Fucking, just fucking. That's all we were doing. It felt good, I love the shallow thrusts so much - they felt so good. I knew he was targeting my G-spot, but we weren't trying for squirting. I was focusing on squeezing him and enjoying the moment. His shallow thrusts were feeling exceptionally good, amazingly good.
Then, all of a sudden, a rush of liquid. "What the fuck!?" I said... I was peeing not only myself but him, too. He didn't notice it at first - but then the stream started rushing in full force all down the bed and him.
"Honey, you're squirting!" He said so happy to me. He kept fucking me, and my squirt kept squirting out. It wasn't a gush, it was an actual forceful stream going everywhere. It felt so good, so surprising. My first reaction was to clamp down to stop it, but then I let go and let it pour out of me.
Tears streamed from my eyes, I felt elated. When I least expected it and when I wasn't looking for it to happen, it just happened. I was so freaking happy! He continued to fuck me and changed his pace from slow to fast and back down to slow.
Then it happened again. Another gushing stream, covering his balls as it fell everywhere. "Oh _____ I love you" he said as he continued his shallow thrusts. I barely managed to say it back through the tears and moaning. "Oh it smells so good!" he said.
He tried to make me squirt a third time, but my mind was so distracted I was too in my head again. He ended by fucking me so hard my screams filled the room.
|The result of squirting twice.|