So, what happened to "The Rule"?
If you're unfamiliar with "The Rule" you can catch up on your reading here (where the Rule was introduced) and here (where the practicality of the Rule was questioned). Here's a quick recap:
The Rule was that we would be together a full year before we even considered the next step of our relationship: lifelong commitment, marriage, etc. We wanted to make sure we had seen and experienced a year together - all the ups and downs, real life, all those moments of reality that you should experience to really know someone.
Well, that year mark passed a few months ago. So, now what?
Well, we're just avoiding it for now. We do know a few things: this relationship is what we both want, forever. We do plan to get married one day. We want kids. We want to grow old together. We've actually known all this for months and all that rule breaking was hinting at it.
We do know a few things -- like we both want a proposal. I want one for the ultimate, romantic moment with my future, well, you know. I want the ring and sweet words. Why is it important? It just is for me.
It's important for him, too. His prior marriage did not start with a proposal. It was not romantic and not sweet - it was more of a demand from her which he agreed to. He wants to propose and ask me to be his. (Cue the "awwwws").
OK, so what's the wait? Well, its mostly financial at this point. He wants to buy a ring and he just started working after months of unemployment. He needs time. We can't even begin to afford a wedding and I don't want to be engaged for a long period of time. I also don't want to get engaged on day 366 of our relationship, or even day 400. (OK, those dates have passed, but you get my drift.)
We don't talk much about it. We know it will happen. For now, we're just going on in life.
OK, so I think about it and I know what kind of ring I want. And he's seen it/them. He still calls me Mrs. ____. We can't help ourselves!
That's just damn sweet. You two are awesome!
ReplyDeleteMrs. AP and I have known for awhile that we're husband and wife at heart. Sadly, she is still technically married (but separated) and we're flat out broke, so we can't have the kind of engagement ring or wedding either of us want.
That said, we want the stability for our kids that having our relationship legally ratified will bring, so it's looking more and more like we'll just end up completing all the paperwork in a very non-romantic way on our 3-year anniversary (please let her divorce have gone through by then!) and having a "wedding" ceremony and party sometime later.
Sometimes you just do what you gotta.
Stay SINful
Mr. AP